This is a guest post from Vara Raturi, a researcher currently working on preventing nuclear war. This post is a mediation on India at 75 - Nathan
Vara
Today marks the 75th year of India’s ‘independence’ from England. I currently happen to be in England. This is weird. I have many feelings. Mostly, they form a khichdi (the name of an Indian dish which is a mixture of various grains and lentils, used as a metaphor for anything that’s complex and mixed-up.) I try to unravel this khichdi while getting ready for work.
I find myself smiling awkwardly when somebody tells me I speak “good English.” I notice the ways this benefits me in India. I’m automatically considered superior, smarter, because I managed to learn my colonizer’s language better than others. So many Indians still believe that English is the superior language. So many Indians are still bound by the shackles of colonialism.
I put down the Hindi book I’m reading and put on my jeans.
While I work on reducing nuclear risk between India and Pakistan, I am reminded today of the violent Partition that created these two modern states and their rivalry that has persisted since. The partition that’s left a bloody trail behind, that furthered Hindus from Muslims and Muslims from Hindus and Hindus from Sikhs and Sikhs from Muslims. The partition that saw extreme gendered violence against women from the ‘other’ community. So many deaths, fires, rapes. How are Indians and Pakistanis okay with celebrating a day that is reminiscent of such violence? I find myself wanting to mourn instead.
I wear white to work today (with a hint of green and orange embroidered on it.)
As Modi’s government forces hyper-nationalism and ultra-patriotism (read: jingoism) on Indian citizens with their ‘Har Ghar Tiranga’ (Tricolour in Every Home) campaign, I’m sickened by the irony this situation entails. The government that has in fact taken away so many rights from certain Indians is asking them to prove their allegiance to the country at gunpoint (or do they not count as Indians at all, since they are Muslim, or Dalit, or - lo and behold - activists?) A 9 year old Dalit boy is beaten to death by his upper caste (or oppressor caste) teacher in Rajasthan. Why? Because he dared to touch the water-pot for the oppressor castes. How dare he taint the purity of this water? India’s independence means nothing for these children who cannot access water without being beaten to death.
I put on some kohl under my eyes.
Salman Rushdie was stabbed a few days ago in New York. I’m reminded of his book Midnight’s Children - a rich, masterfully written book about India in all its pickled glory - and more. The protagonist of the book, Saleem Sinai, is one of the few children born at the stroke of midnight on the day India became independent. And with this, he becomes “embroiled in fate”, personifying the nation that is India. He values his ancestry to extremities, traces his genealogy, only to find - spoiler alert - that he was switched at birth, and that everything he believed to be his roots was actually somebody else’s. I think this is the point where the metaphor of using Saleem as India truly plays out. India’s history is so complex, its genealogy so intermingled, that it is futile to argue about its true ethnic roots.
I slide my jhumkas on my ears.
As I glance out of the window I notice the buildings of Cambridge. I wonder whose labour built these. All cities are built on exploitation, as my cousin reminds me, but in the Olympics of cities built on oppression, English ones would win quite a few golds. Yet I find myself enjoying my time in these cities. I think of my Indian cities and how they continue to thrive on the labour of the working class and the oppressed castes. The labour of women who are beaten and thrown around.
I put on my shoes.
Maybe the khichdi still remains not unravelled. I don’t know which dal I have used, which grains, which milk to make the yoghurt that adds its essence to khichdi. Does my khichdi have ghee, or butter, or oil? I think it’s best had the way it is. I don’t see the point in deconstructing it anymore.
I start to walk.
Much as I disagree with what you sat about the current Modi Govt I still think this is a very good representation of your khuchdi feelings ..thanks to Nathan for giving you thus prode of place in his blog ..you Vara are doing something about the injustice and that is really one should do to proactively bring the change you want
Vara! This is really great!!